Family Happenings

My three boys:  Reed, Gerald and Benjamin

Slowly but surely we change with time.  Layne got used to seeing doctors when he was flying.  The company required two exams each year.  But since retirement his health sentiment has become, "if it ain't broke, don't fix it."  So you may understand how difficult it was for me to arrange for him to see a skin doctor.  He had some spots on his face that were not healing.  I wanted them checked. He didn't.  So I made an appointment for him and just informed him that he was going!  He consented.  But I went with him to make sure the doc checked all the spots I had in mind.  He returned from that experience with burn spots all over his face.  You may imagine how impressed he was with that.  "I'll never go back there," he told me.  I was afraid that he would be quite a sight, covered with red burns, for the duration of the week.  But from the start his magical skin made little of it.  He looked good from the first day.

Frances and Gerald

Elaine's dog, Lili, sitting between my legs.
Elaine says she likes me!

Gerald and his family spent a day with us on their way back home. Gerald is such a good talker. I love that about him. The family locals came over and spent time with us and Ger and family on their last night is the USA. So our house was filled with family and fun once again. We are so lucky to have most of the family close by. Ger and Fran let on Thursday morning. We had a lovely dinner with our neighbors on Thursday night and then I headed to Colorado, where I'm staying with my friend, Elaine Conlon. We are in the thick of girl stuff and watch "chick flicks" each night. I've decided that being away from Layne once in awhile is
a good thing. I realize how much I love him and how valuable he is to me in a dramatic way when I'm away from him. How can that be bad?

Salt Lake

Layne's twin brother, Lynn, his wife Camille
and their son Curtis and family (behind)

I don't like traveling much.  Home has, hands down, the biggest call to me.  But this past week we were off to Salt Lake, to visit with Layne's twin brother, Lynn, and our son Gerald and his family.  Gerald belongs to a benevolent and wealthy Chinese family, via his wife, Frances.  Her father heads an extended family that works together and shares the family monies much like our Church United Order concept.  Because of that, Gerald and Frances live in a beautiful home in Taiwan, owned by the Family.  Hence, their home costs are very minimal.  The Family fund also bought two homes in Draper, Utah.  Ger and Fran have furnished one of them and they stay there when they come to the States with their English students for their month-long tour each summer.

So, after that long explanation, it makes a bit more sense to say that Layne and I determined to spend some quality time with Ger and Fran, so we flew to Salt Lake last week to see them.  Our standby efforts paid off both ways, as we made the flights into and out of Salt Lake just as we planned.  Upon our arrival, all of us headed to Kaysville to visit Layne's brother.  The Galbraith boys claim to be very close and I suppose, in a Galbraithy kind of way, that might be true.  But we see and talk to Lynn and his wife Camille, maybe, once a year.  That would not fit my definition of "close."  I wish it were more as I love spending time with them.  But for some reason, over the years, we haven't been together very much.  So it was a treat to spend a few hours with them last week.  Lynn and Layne are twins, but quite different in temperament and appearance.  We had fun talking and laughing together.

Grandson Seth 

Granddaughter Angelica

Gerald and Fran's home in Salt Lake is almost new, but he had several home projects that he wanted to accomplish. So the rest of our time in Salt Lake was spent working on his projects.  Actually, I love having a job to do.  Working on something that makes a noticeable difference in things is very rewarding.  So it was fun to see progress on the house and the light that filled Ger and Fran as each thing was accomplished.  It was quite bonding, and I'm very keen on that sort of thing.

We came home on Friday and things moved along like they always do.  Saturday was our Stake Conference at Church.  The stake president, President Cooper, asked to speak with us after the meeting (which we missed to attend a neighbor's party).  The outcome of that meeting was life-changing.  Layne has been called to be the new Stake Patriarch!  For a month he has been fearful of being considered for this.  As he responded to the request, his face flushed and his eyes filled with tears.  I believe I understand his fear.  He now must cultivate a spiritual condition that is worthy of hearing the voice of the Lord, by a schedule.  He will be fully dependent upon inspiration to function.  That's pressure!  Not only that, but this is a lifetime calling!

The new Patriarch

Nephew Bryan, who visited us on Sunday,
just in time to learn of Layne's new calling.

Since then we have thought of little else.  What can we do to make our home more receptive to the Spirit of God?  How can we create a more spiritual character?  It is a team calling the Stake President said.  So there will be a function for me to play.  I wonder how this will impact our lives.  Having this assignment does answer a couple of questions that have been on my mind.  We won't be selling our home anytime soon.  We won't be going on another mission any time soon either.  We are here for the foreseeable future.  There is some peace in having that settled.  And, as we move forward, I will say that I have every faith that the Lord will take care of us and direct our path.  This ultimately will be for our good.  It's the details we have to work out.  So now begins our leap into a new spiritual adventure.

Home Activities

Son Ben's girls, Alexis and Jacqueline

I am a free spirit by nature.  Being of this nature, I relish open time.  Time that I am free to do anything with!  I was investing in such thoughts when son Ben called to see if I'd babysit some of his babes while he and Jes went out of town.  Of course I said I would.  So the three oldest kids came on a Wednesday and stayed until the following Sunday evening, when our family time climaxed in an extended get-together to celebrate Cliff's birthday.  It turned out to be a lot of fun, as being with the kids is.  I felt tired at the beginning of my time with the little kids, but got into it.  I'm always pleasantly surprised by my adaptability.  I think we can do and enjoy more than we think.  Often I find myself entering into some activity I don't feel up to, only to find that I have it in me!  It's a happy surprise each time.  I love those kids!

This past while has been full of activity but not much of what I planned on.  It seems like life is mostly like that.  I have array of projects that I hope to accomplish only to find myself leaving those to the very last.  So I rarely get to them.  I need to change that by being a bit more disciplined.  I'm a wild woman with open time; it goes to my head as I fill much too much of it with hopes and plans rather than action.

Balloons at Carmen's grave

Layne and I worked in the temple twice last week.  It was one of those things I didn't want to do but did.  I had so much fun!  It is a joy to  have a place where I feel embraced by the place itself as well as the people that work there.  There seem to be a number of things that I don't look forward to but should.  I wonder how to go about acquiring a happier anticipation of such things.

 Our granddaughter Carmen would have been 11 this year, on August 10th.  We celebrated her life by meeting up with her family at her grave in Antioch.  We talked about our memories of her, put flowers on her grave, prayed for her and released ballons.  I love having a set-apart time to devote to her memory.  As the time passes, it is easy to not think of her as often.  There are now small members of our family that don't know her.  I feel the need to keep her memory ever before us.  I'm glad for these times of remembering.

One of my walking views

I am resolved to exercise regularly.  Again.  This time I determined to use Rayne's newly acquired tread mill.  It's located downstairs in the "dungeon", our room without windows, where the kids often go to play video games.  I was explaining my plan to daughter-in-law Dorothy when she said, "you have 6 acres; why don't you walk around your yard?"  That was a rather obvious suggestion, I thought.  So, taking her advice, I've been walking around our wild and hilly property each morning.  Why do I forget how nurturing it is to be outside, among other living things?  I love those walks.  They take me up hills and down, through the orchard for a peachy snack and through the garden for the latest ripe and ready vegie.  Often the cats follow me and keep me company.  I love it!  Oh, and I'm feeling stronger too.

The Busy-ness of Home

Why is it that desirable things all seem to come at once? During those intense days with my sister in Colorado my son Gerald, who lives in Taiwan, came to visit in Sunol. Daughter Jessica's three children were also at our home. Where was I? In Colorado! "It's all good", as the saying goes. But I felt torn between all those "goods." I kept my commitment to my sister Maryanne, but longed to somehow reach back to home as well. So when Layne suggested I end my Colorado stay by flying right home, I was happy.

But granddaughter Rayne was graduating from BYU Idaho in just a couple of days. She wanted me there soooooo, I gave up my trip home and, instead, drove to Salt Lake with Maryanne, where I met up with daughter Audrey and hub Cliff and drove to Idaho with them. As with so many things that take effort, it was worth it. Rayne looks lovely and her graduation was fun to see. You can see her here, in her robes, in one of the campus gardens.

I was lucky enough to get on an early flight home from there the very next day, on Saturday. I arrived in time to greet Gerald as he and the kids were driving out, on their way to Utah. Our Gendreau kids were still here though so we were at no loss for grandkid company. Layne did a grand job taking care of kids and all else while I was gone. One of the great things about being gone for me is being missed by this hub of mine, who rejoiced upon my return. Now I could take care of the grandkids. How romantic!

Daughter Jessica arrived from Seattle the same day I arrived home. It was great to have her with us. It's a rare thing these days since she is running a book store. We had fun with her and the kids and sent them all off for their home on the following Tuesday. It was a great bond all around even if exhausting. But maybe I'm saying that because I came home exhausted to begin with.

So now here we are, in the quiet that we two alone generate, surrounded by the new collection of boxes from Mom's that Audrey and Cliff were generous enough to bring home to me in their truck. Somehow seeing Mom's things contained in just seven boxes makes it all seem more manageable. I've got all but the family records sorted out and incorporated into the house. Too bad I can't say that this is all. We've made a dent in Mom's things but only just that. Over the next few months we hope to get the bulk of the sorting done. In the meantime, I'm home, alone with Layne, enjoying some open days to do with as I please. For now.

Pictures:  Top is our graduating Rayne; son Reed and his son James are in the thick of a chess game (they came to visit several times to bond with Jessica and her kids); Layne is standing next to a navy buddy, Larry Durbin, who came to visit with his wife, Teddie.  They are great people and also retired from United Air Lines.  Bottom is a glimpse of a day at the beach with Audrey, Dorothy, Jessica and kids.  You see the day through the eyes of grandson Bruce, who LOVED snacking on the sand.

Sorting

Traveling is not my favorite thing to do. Perhaps it is the United Airlines stand-by system that does me in. Each time I leave for the airport butterflies enter my stomach as there is no certainty that I'm going anywhere at all, besides the airport itself. One has to have some spirit of adventure to handle this process. As I grow older I seem to have less and less of it. At any rate on Tuesday evening I began my journey to Salt Lake to meet up with my sister Maryanne. Two late flights to Salt Lake looked promising. I can't imagine why they schedule such late arrivals; it doesn't seem like a prosperous schedule at all. I DID make it on of those flights. That is the good news. The bad news is that both were delayed, making my arrival at the Salt Lake Airport 12:30 AM! My poor brother-in-law, Bob, was there to pick me up without complaint.

Maryanne and I drove to Cedaredge from Salt Lake on Wednesday. It was a lovely drive and I enjoyed a visit with Maryanne that we have not had for three years. The days following have been full of sorting and disposing of the many possessions of my lovely Mother, who saved absolutely everything she ever received. There it all was, papers and mail from years ago, treasures of all sorts that she inherited and received from friends, all piled up in fruit boxes in her garage and behind room. Dirt and general vermin filled the cracks and crevices throughout. But we piled through and managed to dispose of an impressive amount. At least we were impressed. We ended each day covered in filth and grime, but warm with the notion that we were making progress. We enter this week with plans to work inside the house. It's a much cleaner place to be and is filled with family records of all sorts. It is fascinating and frustrating all at the same time. As much progress as we feel we are making, there are piles more to go. One trip definitely will not do the job.

I'm having trouble sleeping here. Perhaps it is the unresolved thoughts about Mom that keep sleep from me. I can't put a clear conclusion on it but I feel a general discontent with being here. I guess I miss my mom and her lively presence. The place is empty without her. It doesn't feel quite right to go through all her things and dispose of them in some way or another. She would not have it in life so I suppose there are some residual feelings in my heart that she may not like it now either. Yet it must be done. I suppose I have my own feelings to sort out as well as her stuff. I also suppose that it will all resolve itself with time.

We've had little in the way of company since we've been here. That has been a blessing. But on Sunday our friend, Tracy Munson, came for a visit. Sometimes conversation can take a magical turn. Our small talk with Tracy turned into a lively conversation about developing talents, using life productively and joyfully and making sense of our journey by adding a meaningful spiritual dimension to it. With such conversations, the Spirit of the Lord enters and warms all. It happened with
our conversation with Tracy. At these times the joy of intimacy invades and rewards, making interaction with friends so rewarding. It was so for us last night.

Today we address the challenge of the house once again.

Pictures: Top is a picture taken by my nephew, Mark, of Mom's mail box, with her driveway and home in the background. Middle you see the trash we accumulated from the room above and the garage. Bottom picture is of the room behind Mom's garage. We began with little room to even move around and quit with lots of moving around space. The picture doesn't do justice to our accomplishment!

Another Cousin Camp

Layne told me not to do it. But I decided not to disappoint the kids so this past week we had a rather informal Cousin Camp. Eight of our grandkids spent the week with us. I admit to being unusually tired. The house was not prepared either. Piles of stuff we brought home from Mom's place fill our rooms. But on they came anyhow. I didn't plan any activities for them as I did last year. They just did their own thing. I put them all in Mom's old room, moving her stuff out of sight.

Wow, what a thing to keep 8 kids happy. My time was totally taken up in their service. Breakfast led into lunch which led into snacks and drinks, then dinner. It was hot. I offered them a trip to the beach and they got so excited. But I could find no second driver to get all those kids there. So Audrey and I decided to get a kid pool for here and have them make do with that. Well...one thing led to another and I wound up getting a much bigger pool than planned. What a blessing it turned out to be. The kids loved
it! What a marvelous score. No worries for the rest of the time.

I often think that I have to "keep the kids busy" but I was delighted to see that these kids had no problems finding their own fun. They searched for life forms, like lizards, frogs and snakes. They helped the cats find mice. They raced on scooters and chased each other around the expansive space that surrounds our house. They watched movies and ate popcorn. They kept each other awake half the night. It was fun, but exhausting.

Friday found the local kids headed for their homes. Daughter Jessica's three Gendreau children remain. After the rest left it seemed like a vacation to only have these three. l have especially looked forward to time with them, as it is so rare. We've had such fun, just the three of them and us. Today we took them to Church. They are not used to Church and know little of the gospel. But they did just fine. We had a great gospel discussion over lunch. I talked to them about the Plan of Salvation and associated ideas. They got into it and asked some very good questions. I felt quite wonderful about the sweet ideas and truths that came forth from their interest and questions. I love this time with just a few of my babes. When the whole gang is here they connect with each other and I am their slave. But when there are just a few, they are my friends.

There has been no time to think or do anything on my own. I know there are issues to work through and stuff to be organized. I suppose that will come soon enough. Tuesday I leave for Salt Lake to meet my sister, Maryanne. We will drive to Colorado and sort more of Mom's things. I'm looking forward to it. There will be some time to rest, in between sorting. Or so I hope. I keep running into changes in my life without Mom. I can go to Salt Lake now without worries about her, for instance. I suppose it will take awhile to face all of the changes that are now before me. Mom was such a part of my life, routine and thoughts.

Pictures: top shows the grandkids all gathered around our cat, Tiki, as she tries to get a mouse she's trapped in the bush you see in the center of the kids. With their help, the mouse escaped. The middle picture shows our new kid pool with happy kids inside. It's pretty big, isn't it? The bottom picture is our Gendreau kids ready for Church.

An Unwinding

Layne and I headed for home with a loaded car on Wednesday morning. It was the first time since Mom's passing that we have been alone for any amount of time. We talked quite a bit. it was nice to have him to myself in an enclosed space where neither of us could escape. Layne has the ability to read me quite well. He senses what I need and does his best to provide it. I'm most grateful for that. We had a lovely time together traveling across the desert toward home.

We arrived home Thursday afternoon, loaded with bags and boxes from the Ranch. Who knew I "needed" so much stuff! Isn't it interesting how a desire for something that never entered your mind before can be awakened upon viewing that something. It is hard not to keep things that Mom treasured, even though they are basically "house clutterers". I'm going to give my kids a chance at these treasures when they come on Monday for Independence Day. In the meantime our home is filled with boxes and stuff.

These past few days I have felt so very tired. It is one of those times when I want to just sit and do nothing. That doesn't happen to me very often but it has hit me big-time now. Perhaps it is just a normal reaction to the high demand of the past months. Or maybe its more than that. While at the Ranch I missed the bottom stair in the wee hours of the morning and fell, hurting one of my little toes. I've been limping a bit since. Then early Saturday morning here I got the mother of all leg cramps. In getting up to stretch it out I fell again. My toe problem has created a bit of imbalance for me, you see. That's my excuse anyhow. That fall hurt the same foot and so I limped around all day Saturday.....again. Maybe that's part of my weariness. Or maybe it is just a mix of all sorts of things. At any rate nothing is put away and I'm surrounded by chaos.

Still can't move the pictures, or see them. But I have faith that the top picture is of Mom's grave. Next, grandchildren Scott and Allegra stand on the grave. Bottom is of me and my girls, Audrey and Jessica.