Christmas 2013

I am happy here in Idaho.  But the thought of spending the Christmas season away from family made me a little sad.  All of our group traditions are out of reach now.  Why is it, I wonder, that I am so resistant to change?  It seems to be a human pattern to fight it.  Yet it often brings unexpected joys. Well, trials too I suppose.  My Christmas thoughts usually centered around family; especially grandchildren.  My plans always revolved around how to celebrate it for them.  So decorating for Christmas here seemed somehow less interesting.  I told my sister Maryanne this early in December. She and her hub Bob have decorated their new home in Draper, Utah with a flourish.  "You should decorate for you and Layne," she said.  "Decorate!"  she said.  So I did.  Though I admit not so completely as in former years.  Still, I have enjoyed my house full of Christmas even without extended family to share it with.

Our special Christmas in our living room.

Layne and I had a small Christmas celebration on Sunday the 22nd.  We agreed not to buy each other gifts, for the first time ever.  But he bought me one anyhow.  And I love it.  We had a sweet time in front of the fire, surrounded by Christmas lights and trees.  On Monday we headed for Seattle, to spend Christmas with daughter Jessica and her family.  It is the first time ever that we have been to their house for this holiday.  Of course it was different, but also very enjoyable.  I love my family!  Being with our Gendreau kids was one of the hidden blessings of our move here.  It is 8 hours to their house; an easy day drive.  We spent Christmas Eve and Day with them, then headed back for home, with their three kids for a week or so while Chris and Jes take a trip together.

Christmas morning at the Gendreau home with
daughter Jessica, husband Chris, Gemma, Miles and Peyton.

Peyton, Gemma and Miles beginning their Christmas unwrapping.

The drive through "the Blues" on our way home from Seattle.
We were blessed with clear roads!

Our first white Christmas!  The trees on the drive to Idaho
sparkled with ice.  It was so beautiful!

Grandchildren.  Three of them.  When they are with us, my life centers around them.  I live for them.  I cook what they like and play endless board games with them.  I read to them and we talk and laugh together.  It is such fun.  I always worry that I won't have the insight to meet their needs; that they will be bored; that they won't have a good time.  But I forget how easy it is to love them and enjoy them.  These particular children are not members of the Church so I feel a need to share my faith with them; to give them a hope of faith in God and the pleasure of prayer.  So each day I try to share something of God with them.  I worry that without that faith the world will eat them up.  Each day I pray that I will share the right things with them.  I hope it is enough.

A lengthy game of Risk with Miles and Gemma.  It would have
gone on for days, I sure, if they hadn't decided to bag it after
a day's effort at determining a winner.

Gemma wasn't up for Risk.  Here is how she spent
her time during our never-ending game battle.

Although it has not stormed for quite awhile, there is still snow everywhere here.  It is colder than normal (so we are told), so the snow hasn't melted much.  The kids like it and ran through it for most of their first day here.  But it is cold.  So most of the time we are inside.  Tonight we plan to stay up to welcome the new year in.  The kids will be up for it.  I hope we will!  

Singing and Singing Again

Our trip back from California was lovely.  There was snow everywhere, except on the roads, which were clear, making the drive a happy winter journey.  The roads in our neighborhood were filled with snow.  But our driveway was clear!  Some thoughtful person cleared it for us.  

It was good to be home where we could let down a little and relax.  Except that my singing group was loaded up with engagements.  So from the time of our arrival home until this past Thursday we sang and sang and sang. You may or may not know that singing is not exactly my gift. But with each performance it became more and more fun.  Our little group of ladies is not perfection but we have lots of fun and, I think, our sound is pretty good too. As with our spring performance, the ladies in the group love Layne. So they had a special solo just for him.  He sang the popular song Hallelujah. We changed the lyrics to give it a Christmas message, and he sounded great. After each performance, we spread out and greeted each person in our audience. It was quite joyful to look into their eyes and wish them a Merry Christmas.

The Treble Clef Singers, in costume, practicing for multiple performances.

Layne has had a bout of vertigo for the last few days.  Because of that I worked in the temple without him on Friday.  After all the wonderful lights and celebrations at the Oakland Temple you may imagine my disappointment in telling you that there is absolutely no sign that it is Christmas at the Boise Temple.  No lights.  No nativity.  There is no external way to tell that we believe in Christ or celebrate His birth.  I could not resist telling the assistant matron and suggesting that we have lights and nativity and maybe even a visitor's center so that we can attract people to the temple.  She agreed with me and said she would bring it up with the current temple presidency, or at least her husband.  Nothing will change this year, but maybe next...one can hope.

By the time our temple shift was over it was snowing.  I couldn't help but be excited to walk to the car in the snow!  We were surrounded by beautiful, falling flakes!  I promised to give a friend a ride to her grandchildren's home on my way home, which meant that we took the city streets instead of the freeway.  Friday evening.  Christmas shopping.  Snow.  Getting dark.  Result:  traffic everywhere, moving an inch at a time.  I dropped off my passenger and headed for the rural streets and home.  The city streets were clear and the many lights lit my way.  But once on the country streets the snow covered the roads and there was very little light.  This California girl was stressed.  With knuckles whitened by fright I proceeded forth slowly.  Very slowly.  Each little skid struck fear in my heart.  The snow accumulated on the wipers making my window of vision smaller and smaller as I proceeded along.  But, two hours from my departure time, I crawled safely onto our driveway.  Layne was there, sweeping it clean for me.  How grateful I was to be home!  Snow is great, especially when it is falling from the sky.  But not while I'm driving!

Our home, with a winter look.

There are no secret approaches in the snow!

Layne sweeping the driveway just after our snow storm.

Christmas will be different for us this year. Since we have no family here, Christmas, for the first time, will not be at our house. I'm a little sad about that. But we plan on driving to Seattle tomorrow to spend Christmas with daughter Jessica and her family. We have not spent many Christmases with Chris and Jes, so this will be extra specially nice. Because of this change in our Christmas celebration, Layne and I had our own Christmas experience today. I fixed Layne a special Christmas dinner, then we sat in front of the fire surrounded by Christmas lights and opened the gifts that we had.  It was a sweet time even if very different than what we are used to.  What is it about us that fights change?  Why are we
somehow saddened by it?  In theory I think change is good for us.  But I resist it.

Our Idaho Christmas.

Cracking Nuts Again

I love being in California.  There are so many people that I love there.  Among them are Rachel and Cheoh Tan, the organizers of the Temple Hill production of Nutcracker.  Rachel asked us to help her present the idea of Nutcracker to the Temple Hill committee several years ago as an addition to their Christmas programming.  She was worried that they would not consider it spiritual enough.  But we presented our vision of it to them and they agreed.  So the Tans sacrificed their time and money to make it happen, for the first time in 2010.  They asked Layne and me to be the old folks in the first scene.  Layne isn't prone to such things (it involves some dancing you know), but, for Rachel's sake, he agreed.  It turned out to be a lot of fun.  Each year Layne says "never again."  And when Rachel asks him once again to participate, he winds up saying, "yes, of course."  And so, for the forth time, we danced in the Nutcracker.

Since the dances and arrangement were almost the same as last year, we practiced the dances at home and were prepared when we arrived for the last few rehearsals this past week.  This year was the most relaxed and fun of any.  I'm not sure why.  Maybe it was because we knew the dances.  Maybe it was the positive comments of our instructor this year.  Maybe it was the fun of reconnecting with old friends and making new ones.  Maybe it was the pleasure of being on the lighted Temple Hill once again.  Whatever the reasons, we enjoyed this production most of all.  In spite of that, Layne announced once again that this would be our last year.

We had lunch with Rachel and Cheoh the Sunday after the performances (full houses both nights!) and they asked us once again if we would be in next year's performance.  Guess what Layne said.  You guessed it. "Of course."  So it looks like we will return next year for yet another performance.  I'm glad.

The Oakland temple grounds, dressed for Christmas

Our dancing bunch in the party scene of the Nutcracker.

Here I am with scenery from the party scene,
the opening act.

Layne with one of the prince's palace scenes.

A California Thanksgiving

Driving is becoming a way of life for us now.  Since everyone we know and love is far away, there often seems to be no other way of connecting.  Especially when we have lots of stuff to transport.  I'm happy to say that I am done with family Christmas gifts.  We filled the back of the car with them.  There are times when the space provided by a comfortable car is such a luxury.  So, on Wednesday, a week ago, we headed for California by car, to spend Thanksgiving with family and prepare for our Nutcracker performance.  We munched our way through Oregon, Nevada and then California, arriving at a comfortable 6PM at Mountain House, where Audrey and Cliff now live.

It is so different to be in our children's space instead of having them in ours, as it has been for so many years.  The local family gathered at Audrey and Cliff's for Thanksgiving.  We had people from our side of the family and some from in-law sides.  It was a bundle of humanity here, and fun.  I love being surrounded by people that I know.  Not so much when the bunch are strangers.  It is a great blessing to have family.  I'm reminded of that almost daily, but especially when we gather together.  It is somewhat magical to think that Layne and I have managed to produce such an abundance of progeny.  I can't help but feel joy in it.

Since we are here until Monday the 9th, we have some open time.  I have pressured Layne into visiting some of our friends.  Layne, you see, is perfectly happy just spending time alone, reading or some such solo activity.  Not that he isn't social.  He lights up when in a group.  But he doesn't seek it.  So I had to make the arrangements for various visits and then urge him to accompany me.  We've spent the last day or so visiting our Fremont neighbors and a couple of others.  Once with them, pleasures bubble to the surface as we visit and catch up on their family news.  Connections and affections are renewed.  Making the time to visit is so worth it.

Today we begin Nutcracker rehearsals in earnest.  Performances come up this weekend.  I'm feeling pretty calm about it.

Daughter in law Dorothy on right with her sister Emily on left.
Do you think they look alike?

Reed and Dorothy's youngest, Bruce, enjoying
Thanksgiving goodies.

Ben and Jessica's Zachary, celebrating his December birthday
early, with family.  Brother William is on the left.  Reed and
Dorothy's son Timothy is on the right.

Ben and Jessica's youngest son, Jonathan.

Benjamin and youngest daughter Victoria.

Alexis and Abigail, two of Ben and Jes' daughters.

Our Nutcracker buddies, Howard and Sandra Burnham, with Layne
just after a delicious Japanese feast in Dublin, CA.

Audrey and Cliff's suave son Isaiah, mixing
up a sour dough potion for his own special batch
of sour dough bread.  Mother's sour dough
starter lives on!

Holidays in the Air

As the cold descends upon us, the air here leans into the uplifting spirit of the holiday season. There are colorful lights popping up all over town.  Our singing group practices have put Christmas songs in my mind.  For the first time ever I have all the family gifts bought, wrapped and ready.  And it isn't even Thanksgiving yet!  Wow.  I'm so proud of myself!  So, in spite of being far from family, I feel the spirit of Thanksgiving and Christmas already.

The large Costco Christmas tree we bought for our California home will not fit in our home here.  I love that tree but it is no use keeping it.  So I offered it to my sister Maryanne and her hub Bob.  Their new home in Draper, Utah will hold it nicely.  They offered two smaller trees in exchange, so the deal was made.  On Thursday we drove half way to their house and met up with them in Burley, Idaho, to exchange trees.  So, instead of one big Christmas tree our home is filled with smaller trees.  5 are now arranged in our entry and living room.  It seems like a lot doesn't it?  But I think it fits nicely.  Once filled with lights, it will be lovely and, I think, joy-promoting.  Sparkly stuff does that, you know.

On Wednesday we pack up for California.  We will be there for Thanksgiving and stay on until after our performance in Nutcracker, on Temple Hill in Oakland.  By then Christmas will really be in the air.

I'm excited for it.

The beginning of lights in the front yard.

Some of the trees in the living room.  I plan to add another
tree and more lights later.  There is something magical about lights!

The Christmas tree exchange in Burley, with Bob and Maryanne.

Layne in Burley, wearing the jacket daughter in law
Frances gave him in Taiwan.

Jet Lagging

Ah, how sweet to be home.  Except that, instead of waking at 5 am as I did in Taiwan, I sleep until 7:30 or even 8:00!  That is way sleeping in for me.  I like to be up and doing early.  I'm having trouble retraining myself.  But I am happy to be back into something of a home routine.  Memories of Taiwan rest sweetly on my mind and I cannot resist the frequent wish that, somehow, our Taiwanese family could be closer by.

In spite of a rather lengthy readjustment time, our days are filling up with activities and assignments.  My little singing group is practicing once again for a Christmas concert series.  Layne is singing with us again.  That little group of ladies just love him.  Our leader has even gone to great lengths to find a Christmas song for his base voice.

We are also dancing in Nutcracker, in Oakland, CA, again.  Layne once again says this is absolutely the last time we will do this.  But I'm happy for it as it takes us back into familiar territory for a long enough time to reconnect with people there to our hearts' content.  We will even get to spend Thanksgiving with family.  I'm excited about it.

Our first time to be in charge of our Addiction Recovery group came this past Sunday.  Layne is in charge of the guys group; mostly addicted to porn.  I am in charge of the ladies group; mostly wives of the guys in Layne's group.  I was nervous.  But it seemed to flow nicely.  I am so impressed that this little group of women are willing to meet together and develop methods of forgiving and supporting their husbands or other family members.  They are a group of doers.  That is quite something to behold and admire.  It occurs to me that the 12 step program of recovery that the Church has established (after the pattern of AA's 12 steps) is a workbook on repentance.  I find it quite helpful in breaking down steps to changing behaviors.  I've decided to use it myself.  I love the emotional openness of my ladies.  They are willing to share their feelings so openly and frankly.  It is inspiring to me as I am so emotionally closed.  Just listening to them has helped me to explore my own emotions more honestly.  I think this assignment will be a great blessing.

It is getting colder.  The trees are mostly denuded now.  But the grass is still green and we have some mums in the front yard that seem to do best when it is cold, as they are full of blossoms.  I love being caught up in the changes of nature.  There are so many here.

Our front yard; note the bright, cold-loving flowers.

Our back yard with leaf-less trees.  Thank goodness for evergreens.

 

Taiwan

October would be a great time to visit, son Gerald told me.  I think you should come, he said.  So we began making plans for yet another trip.  This appears to be the time in life when we seem to be at our kid's disposal.  Not that I mind; I love spending time with them.  After a couple of pleasant weeks at home, we packed up and headed out.

Going to Taiwan is sort of a big deal.  It takes 1 1/2 hours to fly to San Francisco, then 11 hours to fly to Narita, Japan, sleep overnight and catch a 2 1/2 hour flight into Taipei.  Whew, two days later we arrived.  Our night in Japan turned into a blessing as it gave us lots of sleeping time.  So by the time we arrived in Taipei we felt pretty good; no jet lag to speak of.

Outside our Narita hotel the entrance sign was
decorated for Christmas!  

There was a bamboo forest near our Narita
hotel, where we spotted this amazing spider.
For a spider, he (or she) is quit beautiful!

The door to our Narita bathroom.  Definitely
not made with a tall man in mind.

We had our best time yet in Feng Yuan, Gerald and Frances' home town.  We visited the kids' elementary school (where both Frances and her father before her attended).  It was arranged for us to give simple presentations in both Seth's and Angelica's classes.  So fun!  Layne talked about flying and I talked about Halloween, which they are really into.  They were fascinated although I must admit that much of their fascination probably centered around our not being Asian.  They called us grandma and grandpa and practiced their best English on us.  It was a lovely experience, followed by photos of us with the kids.  Some of them even sent gifts home to us.  We felt so honored and appreciated.  Respect is big here.  Especially for older people.  I like it.

Angelica's class.  She is in the front row, wearing glasses.

Seth's class.  He is in the back row, the tall guy in red.

Seth loves to run.  Here he is running during
PE at school.  He's in the middle.

Gerald and Frances have a successful English school here.  This year they are giving a lot of attention to Halloween.  Their teachers decorated the small school building across from their home for a special Halloween experience for their students.  One of the teachers (all are BYU grads) had a vision for a spook alley room that was bigger than she was.  So we decided to help her make it happen.  Layne, I, Seth and Angelica went to work painting cardboard panels and turning them into a spooky maze.  Sunny, the teacher, added bunches of other stuff.  She was there every evening, developing her vision.  She would not be compromised!  We started helping her last weekend and she was still at work Thursday night.  Such steel-willed determination is pretty rare.

Here is Gerald with a class of tots at the English school.

Here is part of our mural for the spooky maze.

We ate dinner each night with Frances' parents, the Changs, who live next door.  Her mama's meals all follow the same pattern:  we each are served a bowl of rice; the rotating lazy susan holds a selection of vegetables, meat and fish, with a pot of soup in the middle.  We graze through the various offering, placing them on the rice and eating it all down to just some rice grains remaining in the bottom of the bowl.  Then comes the soup to finish up every morsel.  Dessert is fresh fruit.  It is a great way to eat, and delicious "Han suh" is delicious in Chinese.  I used it every night.

Here I am with Mama Chang, in their dining room.

The problem became eating too much of all this good stuff.  Being the caring people that they are, they kept filing us with big meals and all sorts of treats in between.  So, in the midst of these skinny Chinese, I believe I've gained weight!

While there we experienced a sweet family miracle.  Gerald's children are now 9 and 11 years old and still not baptized.  He wanted to wait until Fran felt good about it and give her permission and blessing.  She has felt that they were too young.  So they have been fasting and praying for three years for her heart to soften.  While we were there Seth felt inspired that now was the time to ask his mom again.

Frances has been struggling for some months now with insomnia and digestive issues resulting from extended periods of high stress, brought on by her own relentless work load.  It has brought her to her knees and to a rediscovery of God and the spiritual world.  Her heart is tender.  So when Seth asked to be baptized this week, she said yes!

Cautious excitement followed as Gerald quickly arranged for the baptisms last Wednesday.  The Chang grandparents came, along with a surprising number of others.  Layne and I gave the talks.  A sweet spirit filled the room as the meeting proceeded.  And so we experienced our miracle, timed when we could be there!  So far we've attended the baptisms of every grandchild and I believe I've spoken at all of them.

Wednesday October 30, baptism day!  Here you see Seth and Angelica
in front.  Back is Papa Chang ("The Chairman"), Layne, Gerald,
Mama Chang, me and Frances.

We spoke English to the senior Changs and they responded in Chinese.  Still, we managed to communicate, using sign language, limited mutually understood words, smiles and laughs.  The Chang family show their love through service.  They made our stay embracing by feeding us, paying all of our expenses and providing sweet comforts of various sorts.  Frances, too, spent time with us and did all sorts of things to serve us, including a trip to a place nearby called Chalk City.  Rayne visited it while she was here and I've wanted to see it since then.  It isn't really much, just someone's abandoned home that is covered in drawings, done in brightly colored paint. 

Here we are, posing with a brightly clad guy, at Chalk City.

We were able to spend quite a bit of tim with Seth and Angelica; also Gerald and Frances.  "I"m much better now," Fran assured us, speaking of her struggle with insomnia.  And she is.  We had a lovely visit with her.  Gerald and I talked for two hours straight one day.  He studies both spiritual and temporal subjects regularly and has developed a powerful philosophy and has an extensive plan for educating his children.  He is very consistent with personal study and teaching time for the kids.  I'm so impressed with his insights and competence.  

There is something special about the Chang family.  Perhaps it is their strength of character.  Perhaps it is their affectionate ways; unusual in the Chinese culture.  There is something about them that calls out to us.  We love them.  This visit with our Chinese family was the best ever!

A flight to Narita, then San Francisco, then Boise brought us home 24 hours later, by Friday night.  I saw two great films along the way and thanked Layne for taking me to the movies.  It's the only time he does.

Seth

Angelica

Homes:  Gerald and Frances live on the left; Senior Changs
on the right, in the bright white home.

Gerald and kids, on the way to school.  Taiwan is
full of scooters.  Perhaps because gas is so expensive.

Lost and Found

Not long ago I noticed that my wedding band had broken in half.  I wore it out!  What a great time to get my diamond reset, I thought.  So we visited a jeweler that my son-in-law recommended.  He had some nice options.  I selected a thick white gold band which he said he could set my diamond in.  I was excited.  We picked it up several weeks later and I've worn it ever since.  But on Thursday, as I was washing up for the day, I happened to look at my ring and the diamond, complete with prongs, was missing!  Just a little indention in the band remained where it had been.  I had been home all day but could not imagine where that diamond could have gone.  It could have been anywhere in the house or outside.  I said a little prayer that somehow I would find it.  Then I felt something hard under my toes.  I looked down and there it was!  It felt like a sweet blessing from the Lord.  I'm sure He didn't care whether or not I had a diamond but I surely did and He honored my wish.  I'm grateful!

Layne tells me often to slow down.  I seem to find myself running from one thing to another most of the time.  I can't explain why I do it.  There seems to be a voice inside of me that presses me to be productive every minute.  Yesterday I planted some lavender plants from a neighbor and, as I worked outside, the warmth and beauty of the day seduced me.  I found myself sitting in the little bench on the side of our yard and just, you know, relaxing!  A gentle breeze blew through the thinning trees and the sun shone down upon us, the trees and me, in a magical way.  I sat there for some time, taking in all the fall beauty.  The cats soon joined me.  Cherry, the black and white one (and my personal favorite) sat beside me and received my strokes and tummy scratches with happy purrs.  There we sat in total pleasure for some time.  Layne decided to mow the lawn and he rode by, enjoying his riding machine, in the sunshine.  I felt totally and absolutely at peace.

I suppose that there is something to be said for sitting still.  Absolutely still.  

Cat Cherry, sitting beside me in the yard.

Layne mowing.

Fall at work.

Our perfect fall day, looking over the back yard.

The other cat, Tangie, staying close by my bench,
but not too close by.