Crowded Times

This picture was taken in September, at Mongolian
daughter Brynn's wedding.  She just sent it to us.
I think it is better than most.

Sunday birthday celebration for granddaughter Abigail, who turned 3.

Another January birthday; grandson Bruce tuned 1.

Two of our boys; Ben on the left, Reed on the right.

January is usually a nice, quiet time that is perfect for Holiday recovery.  But this January is turning out to be very busy indeed.  After our shift at the temple on Wednesday we were notified that my friend Rosemary Howard died.  I have mentioned her in an earlier blog but, to refresh, I have known Rosemary since moving to Fremont some 40 years ago.  She is about my age and the mother of 8 children.  When she was 55 she was in an automobile accident that resulted in a head injury.  After that incident she slid into an Alzheimer's type condition.  She quickly lost her mental capacity and shrank down to a fetal position, unable to do anything on her own.  Her husband, Zip, cared for her for the next 11 years, until this week.  Some of the children helped, but basically Zip was the one who was there for her every day.  He has been very devoted and anxious not to lose her, even in her extreme condition.  Perhaps that is why she lasted for such a long time.

Her daughter asked me to help dress the body.  I dreaded it, but met her at the mortuary on Thursday morning.  I did not want to see her fragile little body again, but it tuned out to be a sweet experience.  I can't quite put into words why it is.  I found it true when I helped dress our granddaughter Carmen and when I helped dress Mother.  Were those recently departed ones there with us?  I don't know.  But something sweet happens with this tender service of dressing.

I was also asked to speak at the funeral on Friday.  Boy did I sweat that out.  Rosemary's husband and 7 of her eight children are not active in the Church as Rosemary was.  They were in deep mourning.  What could I say?  I worked, prayed and worried.  By Thursday night I had a talk put together.  After I went to bed more ideas came to mind.  I got up and wrote them down.  When I awoke, more came to me.  I integrated it all and headed for the funeral.  I believe it turned out well.  It seemed to.  I hope Rosemary was pleased.  I hope it comforted the family.  I felt a warm, sweet spirit as I presented it.  But I was sooooo glad when it was over!

Friday afternoon we headed out for a get-away in Sonoma.  If you know Layne at all you know that he is not keen on such things.  He'd much rather stay at home with familiar habits and sights.  Just about any adventure I suggest to him is met by the same response.  "Let's just stay home."  But this time there was a  little outside pressure.  My high school buddy, Lyn Hooker, and her husband asked us to go.  We committed to it in November.  I bribed Layne by telling him that I would pay for the weekend out of my inheritance money so he should just relax and have fun.  So, off we headed, right after the funeral.

We arrived at a very nice, vintage hotel (Fairmont Sonoma) about 2:00.  Lyn and Jimmy arrived shortly afterwards.  We went to lunch and then settled in our hotel rooms.  We came to this particular place because Lyn, a lover of food and cooking, wanted to eat at the French Laundry, a very famous restaurant.  When she discovered that the cost was $265 a plate, she shrank and settled instead for another restaurant run by the same famous chef that cooked at the French Laundry.  Our dinner reservation was late so Lyn and I had facials at the hotel.  Wow.  For a mere $175 we experienced an hour of luxurious massage and all sorts of facial potions and rubbings.  I have to say that I loved every minute of it.  But the tight-wad in me will not do it again any time soon.

Lyn had no idea how to get to the restaurant in Yonksville.  It was supposed to be near our hotel.  But it turned out to be some 30 miles away.  No problem I assured them.  My iphone would show us the way.  Trouble was, I'd never actually used that iphone function.  So things got a bit mixed up on the way.  Ok, we got lost.  We finally made it though, and entered a small and very noisy restaurant, late but still able to get our reserved (two months ahead) table.  The famous food was good.  I'm no gourmet so I must admit that I wouldn't travel there again just for the food.  It was lovely but so are a lot of other places.  Still, it was an adventure.  Layne and I had a lovely bond.  There was something about being away with nothing to worry about that opens a person up.  I felt almost giddy with happiness at being away on this outing.  I think Layne enjoyed it in spite of himself.  We had a wonderful time.

The near-by kids came over yesterday to celebrate our January birthdays (there are 5 of them, including mine!).  It was a fun time.  Ben and Jes are all moved out of their rental and in an extended stay.  Did I mention that the owner of their home sold it and asked if they would be willing to break their lease and move out by January 16th?  She sweetened the deal considerably by offering to pay them $50,000 if they would do it.  Is there any question that they would?  Ben seems to fall into deals.  There must be something in his persona that makes things like this happen.  It looks like they have found another place that will open up the middle of next month.  So we will all chip in and help them move yet again.  Wow what chaos.  But rich chaos!

Dampness in Seattle

Now that Mom has left us, there is an opportunity for travel.  I don't have a passion for travel per se, but I do desire to connect with the people I love.  Our first trip of the year came up this past week as Layne and I found our way to Seattle, to see daughter Jessica and her family.  When we fly, it is always stand-by on United.  I'm still mad at our airline for all the mistreatment of their employees and retirees, but enjoy our remaining perk of free travel, albeit on standby.  Butterflies live in my stomach with each effort at air travel, as we never really know if we are going or not.  Thursday morning included plenty of apprehension as all flights for the day to Seattle were oversold, except the 7 AM  flight, which had ONE seat.  We got up at 3:30 AM to try for that flight.  Seems a bit early, doesn't it?  But taking BART to the airport involves an hour and a half travel time, and we arrived an hour early.  It makes for a long day and we were so hoping that our sacrifice of sleep would pay off.

As is often the case with early flights, there were lots of no-shows.  That opened things up for us.  Not only did we get seats, but so did all the other stand-bys.  Blessed again.  With this set-up I always measure our success in flying with the Lord's blessing.  Somehow we were meant to visit at this particular time.  This approach in my thinking helps me to make the most of things.

We had in-depth visits with both Jessica and her husband, Chris.  I felt that we understood their hearts during this visit.  Exchanges with the kids were more abbreviated.  This trip seemed to be for Chris and Jes.  Layne spent lots of time in Jessica's bookstore, as he is her book keeper.  It's a charming little used bookstore.  Jessica knows how to decorate and Chris knows how to provide the infrastructure needed.  The store has been open for a year and a half now.  They are giving it two years to turn a profit.  What is the future for books?  They will not go away entirely, but we all wonder how many will be displaced by technology.  What is the future for bookstores like theirs?  Jessica loves everything about books; their touch, smell, readability.  She glows in their midst and loves being surrounded by them.  That's a perfect fit for a bookstore.  Now if it can just become profitable.

Seattle provided its usual winter fare:  clouds, rain and mist.  In spite of it, we walked to the bookstore and back, taking an hour on the way there.  Wow.  I could really feel my "out-of-shapeness".  My shins are sore from the effort.  The mist wrecked my fluff "do" as well but I convinced myself that I didn't care about  such vain concerns.  During the walk anyhow.  For some reason I have a thing about hair.  I want it to be just right all the time.  How silly is that?  Silly indeed yet hard to let go of.

While we were there we went to a movie with Chris and Jes that I can recommend.  It was called, "The Artist".  Apparently it is a limited release, but so different and so good, with a positive message.  All in all we enjoyed our time in Seattle.  Our trip home was easy; there were lots of open seats on our flight.  So many in fact that we flew First Class!  That rarely happens on domestic flights these days.  We felt indulged and blessed.  The remainder of this month promises to be full of activity and yet another trip, as we prepare to visit our kids in Taiwan.  More on that as it unfolds.

Chris and Jessica's kids are below:

This is Miles, 10 this month, relaxing in the family room.

Gemma is the oldest at 11.

Here is Peyton, 7, in the middle of some chatter.

New Year's Eve

Abigail doing her own thing

 Isn't it interesting that life's experiences are almost never balanced.  There is either tons of something or a scarcity of it.  One has to look at the big picture to see any kind of balance.  Or so it seems to me.  Most of our days are pretty quiet now.  I've come to enjoy that.  But the holidays bring tons of people into my life and space.  I love that too even if it requires lots of effort to support.

New Year's Eve brought the local family once again to our house.  Layne rented an inflatable jumping thing for the kids again.  We filled the house with games and food.  It was wild and fun.  We replayed the nativity play of Christmas Eve and held our yearly talent night.  The pictures here show every grandchild displaying some kind of talent, except for the two babies.  I can't help feeling pleased in seeing each child willing and able to share something with the rest of us.  That's pretty impressive.  All them appear here, showing off their stuff.

Zachary 

So ends another year.  As I think of it, my usual New Year's Resolutions could be repeated yet again in 2012.  I seem to make little progress with them.  So, this year  I'm trying something different.  I'm only going to make one resolution:  get in shape!  Maybe if I just concentrate on one thing I can accomplish it.  Change is so hard.  For this one resolution I have done the following:
1.  Taken my weight and measurements (hoping both will go down!);
2.  Set aside the time I want to spend on exercise;
3.  Gone through my exercise tapes and arranged to use each one on a different day of the week;
4.  Set out my weights so they are easy to access, and committed to using them
2-3 times a week;
5.  Set out a work-out outfit;
6.  Told several people how committed I am.

William

Timmy doing sit-ups

So here's hoping that all this effort will pay off.  Happy New Year.

Jacqueline on violin; Alexis
on piano

Isaiah

Vincent

Scott

Allegra sharing her new business
venture as a knitter of toys;
She has made over $100 so far
(She also plays the piano)

James

Christmas

Daughter-in-law Dorothy asked me to babysit last week, on Monday.  Baby Bruce had the flu and she wanted to take him to the doctor's.  I spent that day and the following in Brentwood, taking care of kids and generally trying to help out.  All of the kids were taking turns with the 12 hour flu so I was exposed on many fronts.  By Thursday I had it.  I pride myself at resisting stuff like that so I was a bit disappointed at my body for not doing so this time.  After all, it's Christmas and there is much to be celebrated.  But succumb I did, so last week was pretty lost.

Fortunately I felt mostly ready for Christmas.  Gifts were all wrapped and I was fairly well prepared for Christmas Eve, when everyone would gather for our annual celebration of the birth of the Savior.  I put lots of preparation, hope and prayer into this special night.  It is dedicated to the spiritual side of Christmas.  I always envision a perfect family re-enactment of the Savior's birth, done by spiritually minded grandkids who really get into the story and take it seriously.  I suppose it is pretty obvious that I set myself up for disappointment.  This year I did several things to lessen it:  I gave out nativity story parts to the kids early so they could read up and practice their parts; I picked out, organized and labeled the costumes so they could find them and put them on easily; I cleared out a bigger space for the re-enactment; I made a little book of the nativity story with the kids as characters in case the whole thing turned to worms.  At least there would be something in writing as a back-up.

Granddaughter Jacqueline is narrating our Christmas Nativity Story.
A picture of Christ creating the world is on the TV screen.

Allegra and Scott are Joseph and Mary

Here are the grandkids at the end of our Christmas Eve, dressed in
their new Christmas pajamas.

So, here is the report:  only some of the kids actually prepared their parts BUT it went pretty well!  The kids played their parts, we took lots of pictures and video and generally enjoyed the outcome.  So all that work was worth it.  We followed up with a candle ceremony, where each person receives a candle, shares a positive thought and places their lighted candle on a center table.  By the end there is a lovely collection of light which we liken to the light our family can share with the world.  It is a lovely thought which I hope the children catch.  So, in summary, I felt fairly good about our celebration.

Christmas day was crazy fun yet I felt a bit of melancholy.  I often cannot figure myself out.  Sometimes I am overwhelmed with feelings that I can't explain to myself.  Perhaps my bits of sadness came because I didn't feel my best (flu hangover) or perhaps I was missing my mom.  Or perhaps a bit of both.  Or maybe there is a bit of something else that I haven't figured out yet.

This week I experienced a bit more of sickness.  Disgusting but true.  I seem to be on the mend today.  Feeling crummy has kept us from meeting up with son Ben and family at their rented cabin in the snow.  I'm sad to miss it.  But I've got to get a grip; this Saturday is New Year's Eve and the whole family will gather once again for a marathon night of food, games and conversation.  I wouldn't want to miss that.

At this closing of 2011 I feel grateful for the peace and plenty that still are a part of our lives here on this wonderful little hill in California.  In spite of struggles and losses, life is so very good.

Cracking Nuts

I think there are probably hundreds of little miracles that happen in our lives that we don't notice.  Monday a small miracle happened to me that I didn't miss.  On Monday Layne and I went our separate ways on separate errands.  Mine ended at the local gas station where I filled our Jeep gas tank.  In the process of that I managed to lock myself out of the car.  Keys were inside.  Also purse.  I tried every door with no luck.  Feeling quite foolish, I entered the gas station store and asked one of the workers if he could unlock my car.  He gave it a once over and said the only way was to break a window.  "What car insurance do you have," he said.  "Maybe they provide towing service."  "Hum," I replied.  "I'm not sure if we have Farmers or State Farm."  "You don't know who insures your car?" he asked me, thinking I was a total moron.  That's kinda how I felt too.  All the car insurance information was right there in the glove compartment.  Locked up.  Out of my reach.  But I did figure out that we have Farmers and was just talking to their help line making arrangements for rescue when I happened to look outside where the jeep was taking up a pumping space and saw what looked like our other car.  I walked outside and moved a little closer.  To my amazement there was Layne, just finishing filling up our Envoy!  There he was, without knowing I was there and in great need of help.  He was delivered to me in some special, magical way.  I was saved.  And I was grateful that somehow he was led to that gas station at that time.  It was a tender mercy indeed.

Here we are just before our last performance of Nutcracker.
Layne has lots of eye make-up on so he looks a little funny.

Layne, daughter-in-law Jessica and son Ben at our Bethlehem
Dinner.  Note the use of fingers instead of forks.  Gotta be authentic!

Ben and Jessica's youngest, Jonathan.

We have been practicing for our part in a Nutcracker production for some weeks now.  Layne refers to our rehearsals as, "cracking nuts".  I kinda like it.  Anyhow all that practicing ended this weekend with our final performances on Temple Hill, in Oakland.  Layne had a solo part again this year during the Grandfather's Dance.  His part was a little more extensive this year, which made him a bit more nervous.  But he did a great job.  The whole show was amazingly good.  I believe I have explained before that our friend Rachel Tan is responsible for this amazing effort to bring the Nutcracker to Temple Hill for free.  She and her husband have spent lots of time and money making it happen.  Rachel has three dance studios and it is her students who present the entire show.  Professional props, beautiful costumes and well rehearsed dancers make for a show that rivals any that you might pay money to see.  Both nights were packed.  Rachel's daughter played the starring role this year and did a lovely job.  I found it quite wonderful that this gift the Tans have offered to so many people is also providing their daughter with an unforgettable experience.   It's a joy to be a part of it.

Tonight our kids downstairs, Cliff and Audrey, had their annual Bethlehem dinner.  Our local family gathers for it and dons shepherds head pieces before being served with Bethlehemish food, which must be eaten with our fingers.  It's a fun experience.

So, after a weekend filled with activities, we are looking forward to a slower pace this coming week.  I think we are almost ready for Christmas.

Celebrations of All Sorts

Our neighbor, Tony, is a high energy guy, full of ideas.  He has done some nice things for us since we've been here.  So when Tony came to Layne with a Christmas idea, Layne wouldn't do anything to discourage him.  Tony wanted to place a large, lighted star somewhere on our hill.  Layne agreed that it would be a great idea.  So Tony bought all the materials needed and asked Layne to build it.  Normally Layne would attempt to get out of yet another project.  But this was Tony.  So he took on the task and now the star rests atop a pole in the field in front of our house.  I love it!  It can be seen from the highway near our road and, hopefully, adds a little sparkle to those who notice it.  All in our little valley can see it as they drive down our road.  A star is a little thing but we are celebrating it.  This never would have happened without Tony!

Our daughter Audrey had her gall bladder surgery last Monday.  She came home Tuesday.  The surgery was routine, as we hoped it would be.  Signs are good for a full recovery very soon.  It's wonderful to live at a time when so many discomforts and physical problems can be solved relatively easily.  She is out of pain and loving it.  This is a little bigger thing to celebrate.

Our star at night

Our Christmasy front door

While she was struggling with her gall bladder she asked me to teach her seminary class.  I found it surprisingly pleasurable.  Not that her students were ready and open but that reviewing the material was joyful, as I once again pieced together gospel history that I take great pleasure in knowing.  My first day with her students was the "honeymoon" day, when they are too interested in a new personality to cause much challenge.  The second day however, the honeymoon was over.  Still, they responded to some of the ideas presented.  Sometimes I weary of trying to teach teenagers.  They must be "won" before they are willing to open themselves to you.  They can be great or difficult, depending upon the situation and the day.

Our son Reed has been out of a job since November.  He's been through several series of interviews and just finished another series last week.  We've been praying for a job offer for weeks.  We are celebrating once again, as, HE GOT A JOB!  He'll begin working for Bank of the West this next week.  What a sweet relief as he has a big family to support.  As soon and the deal was sealed, he and Dorothy went shopping!

I sometimes think we, as a culture, have become too accustomed to being entertained rather than taking responsibility for our own experiences and fun.  So when I was asked to work with two other ladies to come up with entertainment for our ward social, I suggested that we have everyone participate in some way.  We dreamed up a nativity scenario that included all in attendance and it seemed to work well.  There was a happy lingering after the party was over.  One of my theories about that is that, if there is a good spirit present, people are not in a hurry to leave it.  I think that happened last night at our ward social.  It made me happy to see it.

Layne gives his fifth blessing tonight!

A Stumble in the Dark

Some of the biggest changes in life come to us in an instant.  My mother's stroke was one of those things.  She went from a vital, active woman to a very dependent one in an instant.  I had one of those moments this past week, with, hopefully, just temporary results.  I was walking downstairs early Wednesday morning, in the dark, and missed the last stair.  Before I had time to think or react I was flat on the floor, a bit dazed and twisted.  I was on the way to the garage where Layne was waiting for me, perhaps a bit impatiently.  He had no idea of my fate until I finally was able to get up and limp my way to the car.  We were preparing to leave for our early temple assignment.  Layne was very sympathetic once he saw my problem.  I limped my way through our morning temple assignment and early afternoon Costco stop.  As it turned out, I sprained my ankle, and bruised up various other body parts.  I babied the ankle as well as I could but spent the next few days wanting to do nothing except sit and sleep.  I seemed to be drained of all ambition and energy.

It is at times like these when planning ahead really pays off.  I have most of my Christmas obligations done, so those few days of idling gave me no stress.  What a happy thing that turned out to be.  Last year at this time I was a bundle of stress over things I wanted to get done for Christmas.  For me, planning ahead for things like Christmas can backfire.  It happens to me because, having accomplished my early goals, time opens up for thinking up new ones.  Then they become a whole new pressure as I attempt to accomplish them as well.  This year I'm holding myself back.  I've accomplished the goals I set and I'm determined to set no more.

By Saturday I was a new woman.  Energy returned and I began to feel a bit more normal.  My ankle is still double its normal size but it is much less painful and moving much better.  So I guess I'll recover.  But experiences like these call to my mind how grateful I should be for times when my body is all in relatively good working order.  I've been reading a book on physical fitness for old ladies and it has encouraged a more vigorous exercise routine.  I'm considering that.  I can see that it takes more effort than I'm used to
to keep an older body in working order.  This week's experience is a great reminder that it's very nice when all the parts are working properly.  

Today our daughter Audrey awoke with pain.  She has been having these pains on and off for awhile but lately it has been mostly on.  So her hub, Cliff, took her to Emergency where they confirmed what we already thought; she has gall stones and an enflamed gall bladder.  So she goes in for surgery tomorrow sometime to have the pesky part removed.

Here's Jonathan after his blessing.  Note his outfit; shirt, tie and vest.
He makes a pretty cute package, don't you think?

While she was on this hospital adventure the rest of the family headed for Palo Alto to see our newest grandson blessed.  Jonathan Galbraith was blessed by his dad, our son Ben, with an assist from son Reed and Layne.  We enjoyed lunch and a bit of bonding at Ben and Jessica's afterwards.  It was a lovely time even though shortened by the desire to visit Audrey before it was too late.  She is looking forward to the surgery and no more pain.  It is a routine procedure so there shouldn't be any problems.  I believe we are all feeling comfortable with it.

It has been a full but rewarding day as we returned from the hospital to our Christmas-laden house.  Now I must teach seminary for Audrey the next two mornings.  I can't say that I'm excited about that.